6) Na qarshe ita ce salwatacciyar soyayya, mun kira ta salwatacciya ne domin rashin tabbacinta, takan yi kyau in aka yi dace, har ma ka ga an yi aure, an kuma zauna lafiya, amma sauda yawa ba ta ba da abin da ake nema, ita ce soyayyar da aka qulla ta a hanyoyin sadarwa, irinsu Imo, 2go, Facebook, whatsapp da sauransu, galibi wannan ya taqaitu ne da hotunan da matan suke liqawa, hoto kuwa kamar hawainiya ne, canzawa yake yi, wace take baqa qirin tana iya zama fara fat a hoto, shi ya sa wata yarinya ta taba ce min "Kar ka taba yarda da hoton mace!" Maganarta kam gaskiya ce.
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Shari'a ta gindaya cewa kar namiji ya fara neman mace sai ya gan ta, Annabi SAW ya tambayi wani sahabinsa da Abu Huraira ya ce:-
" ﻛﻨﺖ ﻋﻨﺪ ﺍﻟﻨﺒﻲ ﺻﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻠﻪ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ ﻭﺳﻠﻢ ﻓﺄﺗﺎﻩ ﺭﺟﻞ ﻓﺄﺧﺒﺮﻩ ﺃﻧﻪ ﺗﺰﻭﺝ ﺍﻣﺮﺃﺓ ﻣﻦ ﺍﻷﻧﺼﺎﺭ ، ﻓﻘﺎﻝ ﻟﻪ ﺭﺳﻮﻝ ﺍﻟﻠﻪ ﺻﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻠﻪ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ ﻭﺳﻠﻢ : ( ﺃﻧﻈﺮﺕ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ ؟ ) ﻗﺎﻝ : ﻻ ، ﻗﺎﻝ : ( ﻓﺎﺫﻫﺐ ﻓﺎﻧﻈﺮ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ ﻓﺈﻥ ﻓﻲﻋﻴﻦ ﺍﻷﻧﺼﺎﺭ ﺷﻴﺌﺎً )
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Ina tare da Annabi SAW sai wani mutum ya zo ya gaya masa cewa ya auri wata 'yar Madina, sai Annabi SAW ya ce: Ya dube ta? Ya ce: A'a, Annabi SAW ya ce "Tafi ka gan ta, akwai wani abu a idon 'yan Madina" Muslim
Akwai hikima qwarai a cikin maganar Annabi SAW don wani abokina ya same ni cikin damuwa, ya daure dai ya yi magana da ni ko zai sami mafita.
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Ya ce: Sun hadu ne a facebook da wata yarinya, tun ana rubutu har ya kai ga yin magana da juna ta waya, soyayya ta yi qarfin gaske a tsakaninsu, ta tsawon shekara 2, har ya yi ma ta alqawarin aure, amma da ya sami ganinta sai ya isko ta baqa, ba ma baqin kawai ba ya ce ba ta yi masa ba, nan take soyayyar da take ta qonuwa a zuciyarsa ta bice gaba daya, ya ce to ya zai yi yanzu, abinka da Bazazzage kawai sai na ce ya rabu da ita, zafin da za ta ji na 'yan kwanukka ne kawai, ya fi sauqi da a ce ya aure ta alhali ba ya son ta, in hakan ta faru za ta yi shekaru tana jin zafin abin.
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Babbar matsalar da take tattare da irin wannan soyayyar takan damfara ne gaba dayanta a kan sha'awa, za a yi ta zaton cewa soyayya ce, amma a kuma ba ita ba ce, domin sau da yawa samarin za ka taras abin da yake gaya wa wannan shi yake gaya wasu, shi da kansa bai dauke ta a matsayin masoyiya ba, sha'awa ce kawai, ko kuma rage lokaci kamar yadda suke fadi, masamman in ka ga irin hotunan da matan suke sakawa na jan hankali, da irin maganganun da samarin suke yi na qoqarin mallake zuciyoyin matan.
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Irin wannan salwatacciyar soyayyan tana da wasu tasirori da bambance-bambance da sauran kashe-kashen soyayyan ba su da su, domin:-
a) Takan taqaita sau da yawa a kan yaudara, ko dai ya kasance ita macen tana da wanda za ta aura, ko shi namijin ya kusa aure, suna magana da juna ne kawai don dauko hankalin juna, da wahala ka ga wani daga cikinsu ya fadi ainihin sirrinsa ga wanda yake fadin cewa masoyinsa ne, za dai a yi ta yaudarar juna a haka, har dai sha'awar juna ta qullu a tsakaninsu, wani lokaci ma a yi ta batsa da fadin masha'a da sunan soyayya.
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b) Ba ta bayyanar da mutum a kan haqiqaninsa, kowa ya shaqu da juna ne a balangaice, ba wani dalili da ya ja hankalinka har ka yarda da ita, ko ita din ta yarda da kai, ba wanda ya san halin juna, ko tsarin halittarsa, ko yadda ya tarbiyantu a gida, to bare a yi tunanin yadda za a tafiyar da diyoyi nan gaba, sha'awa ce kawai ta son biya wa juna buqata ake yi ma ta fassarar soyayya, da a ce soyayyar ce ta zahiri da wahala in ka ga wanda kake raya cewa kana mutuwar qaunarsa ka baudare masa, ka ce kuma bai yi maka ba.
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c) In da abin ya fi sharri, wani lokaci namiji ne yake dauke da sunan mata, shi ma wani ne da yake ganin shi malami ne yakan yi shigar burtu don ya gano ko wani da suke yi masa zaton alkhairi yana mu'amalla da 'yammata, in mutum ya ji dadin haka sai ka ga yana sato hoton wata yarinya yana sakawa a matsayin ita ce take hira da samari, alhali wani qaton dan daudu ne, wasu sun sha gaya min cewa ka yi hankali da wance, ba mace ba ce wane ne, ga dalilin da yake son ya yi magana da kai, akan yi soyayya da su sosai, sukan zabi irin maganganun da za su gaya wa wani sakaran, ko kuwa su riqa kwafo hirarrakinsu da 'yammatansu suna saka masa, wani lokaci su nemi na credit din wayoyinsu.
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d) Matan aure ma suna shigowa, su kwashi rayuwarsu da wasu mazan, sau da yawa ba sa fadin cewa su matan aure ne, sai sun kai matsayin da samarin suka fara neman su hadu don ganin juna qeqe da qeqe ko tunanin yadda za a fassara soyayyar zuwa ga aure, wani lokacin matan sukan fadi cewa gaskiya su matan aure ne, amma suna neman wanda zai riqa debe musu haso ne kawai a yanar gizo, kenan ba soyayya ba ce saqa yanar sha'awa kawai ake yi ta hanyar yaudarar juna, ko dai namijin ya nemi su hadu, ko in sha'awar ta yi yawa ita macen ta yi qoqarin biyan buqatarta da shi, duk kuwa da cewa tana da aurenta.
