Da farko dai loacin neman aure lokaci ne mai matuqar tsada a wurin samari da 'yammata, masamman ma idan budurwa ta fahimci wani yana neman kusantarta, kuma tana ganin za ta iya ba shi hadin kai, ko wani saurayi ya ga wata 'yar daqwalwa tana kyarkyara, kuma ta yi masa dari bisa dari, na fadi a baya cewa duk wani abu da muke ganin al'adarmu ne mun saba, in dai addini kai tsaye bai haramta ba, sannan an sami sahabban da suka taba yi, to a fahimtata gwara a qaddamar da shi a kan al'adar.
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Abin nufi, duk wata mace, babbace ko budurwa, in dai ta ga wani saurayi ya yi ma ta, kuma tana sha'awar a ce ya zama uban 'ya'yanta, tana da damar da za ta gwada kafa masa tarko, in ta yi ruwa rijiya, in ta qi masai, ban taba daukar kaye wajen neman aure wani qaton abu ba, bare na dauke shi abin kunyar da za a bar halas dominsa, na nemi aure sau 3 ina shan qasa, wannan bai taba sa na yi qasa a gwiwa ba, sai dai na qara daura damaran neman wani, a qarshe dai na ci nasara.
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Mace ba dole ba ne ta bude baki a cikin jama'a ta ce wa saurayi "Ina son ka aure ni!" Kamar yadda muka gani a hadisai da littafan tahiri, tana da hanyoyi kala daban-daban na isar da saqo, kuma tsakani da Allah saqonta yakan isa duk inda take qoqarin aikawa, wani lokaci a yi dace, wani kuwa a dawo hannu rabbana, sai dai da za mu nade hannuwammu mu ce ko mace tana sha'awar ta kusanci wani kar ta yi wani motsi har sai in shi ne ya furta, gaskiya za a rasa wasu damammaki wadan da Allah ne kadai ya san iyakarsu, masamman wannan lokaci da maza suke mutuwa kamar qwanyin kaji, ga alamomin tashin qiyama nan suna ta bayyana.
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Sannan a zahiri ba dole ba ne sai masoya sun dace da juna dari bisa dari, wani lokacin akan dan sami loba kadan, to amma idan aka yi dace da musayar soyayya ta gaskiya, cikin kyakkyawar niyya da gaskiya da amana, sai ka ga abin ya ba wa kowa sha'awa, don Allah ya ga zuciyoyinsu kuma ya sanya albarka a cikin lamuransu, ita mace masamman wace ta girma a tsakiyar matattarar Hausa-Fulani, da dama akan tauye ma ta hakkin zaban wanda take so, kamar dai yadda galibin alqalumarmu suke rubutawa, duk kuwa da cewar muna sane da ba ta da qarfin qwaqwalwar da za ta iya rabe dan kuka da dan tsamiya a daidai wannan lokacin, takan dogara ne kacokan a kan wanda zuciyarta take qauna, ba tare da hangen ko wannan nunin qaunar da yake yi ma ta zai ci gaba ko zai yanke ba.
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In mun tafi a wannan fahimtar, ba na tsammanin cewa haqqin na ta kenan a bar ta ta zabo tumun-dare, haqqin uwaye ne su taya ta neman wanda zai so ta so na gaskiya, ya kula da ita da buqatunta, ya girmama ta a matsayinta na mace, ya kare ma ta mutuncinta da sirrorinta, ya zama ma ta tamkar uba a lokacin da ta rasa uwaye, masoyi a yayin da take ja-in-ja da sha'awarta, sannan qawa a sa'ilin da take neman abokin sirri, aure ba zina ba ne da za a ba mace kudi a hole da ita na 'yan wasu mintoci ko kwanaki, ba kuma qaramin abu ne ba da yake buqatar tsayuwar mutum guda kacal, tsarin rayuwa ne da yake buqatar hannaye da dama, masu ba da shawara da tsarkakakkiyar zuciya.
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A daidai wannan gabar zan so na yi magana kan abubuwa guda uku masu matuqar mahaimmanci:-
1) Duk lokacin da saurayi ya yanke shawarar neman wata budurwa ya tabbatar da cewa tabbas ta yi masa gwargwadon yadda yake buqatar ta, ya yi tunanin cewa ita mace ce da zai yuwu su iya fahimtar juna, cikin girmamawa da sanin mutuncin juna, ya kuma fahinci cewa ita fa yadda take mace, haka qwaqwalwarta take a mace, zuciyarta ce take harbawa kowani lokaci, don haka dole ya san cewa sai ya riqa yi ma ta hanzari tun daga wurin fara nemanta har zuwa lokacin da Allah SW zai raba su.
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2) Kar ita budurwar ta yarda alaqar da take tsakaninsu ta zama sirri, mutum na farko da zai fara sanin abin da take ciki mahaifinta, in kuma tana da tabbacin cewa mahaifiyarta kamar qawarta ce sai ta fara da ita, galibin abin da shari'a ta tanadar shi ne: Saurayi ko iyayensa su nema masa damar da zai fara magana da yarinyar, wasu uwayen in suka ga yaro ne manemin 'yarsu sukan ce ya turo uwayensa, don qulla magana gemu da gemu, wace ta sake harkar sha'awa ta ci gaba da saurayi ba tare da shigowar mahaifanta ba, in abu bai yi kyau ba a qarshe ita ta so, tana da qima da darajar da za ta yi hira da saurayi a dakin mahaifiyarta da rana ido na ganin ido, kowa yana gilmawa.
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Haka shi ma saurayin da budurwarsa ta qi yarda ya sami mahaifanta, wai sabo da wani uzuri, shi ma ya dau haske, don ginarsa ba za ta cin ma ruwa ba.
3) Sirrorin masoya dole ya kasance a tsakaninsu, amma duk lokacin da budurwa ta ji wata maganar da ba ta gane ba, dole ta nemi shawarar wace ta fi amincewa da ita a kan kowa, namiji makiri ne, wani lokaci yakan dama hura kuma ba sha zai yi ba, sai ya bar qudaje su yi ta bin ta, harkar rashin gaskiya ita ake boyewa, Annabi SAW ya ce: Sabo shi ne abin da yake damunka a zuciya kuma ka qi yarda mutane su sani.
Title :
Bambanci Sha'awa Da Soyayya Part 10
Description : Da farko dai loacin neman aure lokaci ne mai matuqar tsada a wurin samari da 'yammata, masamman ma idan budurwa ta fahimci wani yana ne...
Rating :
5
